A letter after this show aired:
To whom it may concern –
I have never heard your program before today, and I am quite confident that the Holy Spirit orchestrated my events today so that I would hear the program that featured ‘Paul’ as the guest, and which focused on sexual integrity. I am currently out of state and away from home for work, and my lunch plans on Sunday June 1st were frustrated in such a way that I happened to be in the car when I heard your program on the radio. The program was still airing when I arrived back at my hotel and so once inside, I looked up your website (which I had never visited before) and found the webcast so that I could listen to it in full. God has always been so faithful to bring people and events into my life exactly when needed. It humbles me to think that God loves a wicked person such as myself so that even after the self-sacrifice of Jesus for the atonement of my sins, He yet continues to pursue me, and does so by continuously bringing people and events such as this radio program into my life in order to either draw me closer to Himself, or to help me avoid some impending disaster. This particular radio program today, I believe, is serving both of those purposes.
I will be praying for Paul, that the Lord will give him victory over this horrible affliction of the flesh – one which I understand myself all to well. I truly love Jesus and I seek to follow Him within all areas of my life, but when it comes to my private thoughts of lust for women, I am completely and utterly failed. I do not drink, nor use recreational drugs, and I have always been gainfully employed and a hard worker on top of it. I have always been faithful and honoring to my parents and my in-laws and generally speaking, people like to be around me. Unfortunately I have lusted for women ever since I entered puberty and it has done nothing but intensify as I have aged to the point that it is a daily suffering for me. I have no doubt that the propagation of women as sex objects through media of all forms, along with the ‘liberation’ of women to be openly permissive with their bodies, has aided my frustrations and failures. But like Paul on your program, I accept my failures as my own. On the outside I am seen as occupationally and financially successful, a loving husband and father, and a pillar within the circles that I keep, including within my church family. On the inside however I am wicked and broken and longing for the day that Jesus finally calls me home so that I can forever be free from this horrific fleshly bent. My pain and frustration in this area is so great that I have often hoped the Lord would make me blind. I recently had a medical condition which severely impacted my eyes temporarily, and as I was being treated by the physicians I was secretly hopeful for my blindness to become permanent, regardless of the other difficulties it would then bring.
If it is possible, please let Paul know that his willingness to share this most intimate of struggles and failures is being used by the Lord this very minute to impact my life in a profound and God honoring way. And if possible, please convey the following to Paul’s wife: My wife of 26 years is a woman who has always sought to honor the Lord Jesus within her life. I have never deserved her as my wife and regardless of the number of times that my sexual lust has brought shame and hurt to her personally, she has always chosen to love me in the same way as Jesus, which is sacrificially. Like your guest Paul, I purpose to have healing and therefore be able to bring happiness instead of heartache to my wife, but my true hope for her is in the day when she will be united face to face with her true and faithful husband, Jesus, where He will likely tell her “Well done good and faithful servant for loving Kirk in the way that I asked of you, for by doing so you have loved me.” I suspect Paul’s wife will receive the same commendation. It is a very high and difficult calling that Jesus has given to both Paul’s wife and mine.
Thank you for your ministry, and especially for this program today.
My hope is in Jesus.